{"id":18678,"date":"2024-04-28T18:57:26","date_gmt":"2024-04-28T18:57:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/essays.homeworkacetutors.com\/2024\/04\/dan-polish-36-watched-as-the-other-mommies-and-daddies-eyes-pooped-essay\/"},"modified":"2024-04-28T18:57:26","modified_gmt":"2024-04-28T18:57:26","slug":"dan-polish-36-watched-as-the-other-mommies-and-daddies-eyes-pooped-essay","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/dan-polish-36-watched-as-the-other-mommies-and-daddies-eyes-pooped-essay\/","title":{"rendered":"Dan Polish 36 watched as the other mommies and daddies eyes pooped Essay"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

Dan Polish, 36, watched as the other mommies and daddies eyes pooped bricks. Opening his hairy bear claws for hands, an African elephant charged out across a flat, wooden surfaced Serengetee, running into a pencil holder and apple.<\/p>\n

Up to this moment, participating in his daughter\u2019s class \u201ccareer day\u201d had been a virtual VIP ticket to Snooze Fest 2039 for the broad shouldered man, blonde man.<\/p>\n

Thus far the bill had included: a graphic designer, a firefighter, a copyright lawyer, a restaurant owner, a nurse, another restaurant owner, a wedding band musician, and a stay-at-home-dad who also operated a small pet grooming service out of his garage.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

The event\u2019s concessions had consisted of lukewarm elementary school fountain water, and whatever expired wads of gum were underneath his child-size desk. In addition, all the acts had been required to sit in front of the third grade class by Ms. Thompson. Polish had to watch the audience members pick their noses, pass secret notes, and yawn over and over again for the past four hours.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

So, when the time finally came for Dan, he knew he\u2019d be the headlining act in the Woodstock of mediocre ways to making a living. Releasing the 2\u2033 wide by 1\u2033 high, genetically re-engineered life form was like Jimi Hendrix closing with his version of the Star-Spangled Banner.<\/p>\n

\u201cHi, I\u2019m Carrol\u2019s dad, Dan,\u201d Polish spoke happily, wrangling in the miniature African elephant, \u201cand I\u2019m a genetic re-animation engineer. Does anybody know what that means?\u201d<\/p>\n

One hand went up, and Polish smiled, \u201clet\u2019s see if the other kids can guess, okay, Carrol?\u201d<\/p>\n

His daughter\u2019s face became the color of a maraschino cherry. She pouted, folding her arms.<\/p>\n

The rest of the classroom remained silent. Polish was certain the adults didn\u2019t really know what his occupation had involved. Of course, they weren\u2019t going to answer though because it was really \u201call for the kids\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that\u2019s okay. I\u2019m pretty sure at my age I wouldn\u2019t have known, either,\u201d Polish continued, \u201cI suppose the best way to put it would be to start with my little friend, Elle, whom you guys just met,\u201d Carol\u2019s father picked up his work. Holding the micro-elephant in his hand, he said, \u201cSay, \u2018hello\u2019 to everyone, Elle.\u201d<\/p>\n

The itty-bitty thing squealed more like a church mouse instead of belting it out the way its ancestor, once the largest animal to roam the Earth, would have in the early 21st century. Nonetheless, Elle was quickly drowned out over the thunderous, unified \u201chell-low-Elle-ee\u201d of the younger generation before her.<\/p>\n

\u201cElle comes from a laboratory where I work. She is a genetically altered clone of an extinct species called the African Elephant, or Loxodonta africana. My job is to resurrect, or bring back, our animal friends in a way that\u2019s more conducive to human life. Does that make sense?\u201d<\/p>\n

Not many were really listening to Polish, but were still transfixed on the tiny creature. A little boy in the front row quickly raised his hand though, \u201cMister-Carrol\u2019s-Dad, what does \u2018conducive\u2019 mean?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGood question!\u201d Polish began.<\/p>\n

Before he could answer the boy, the stay-at-home dad interjected, \u201cIt means \u2018better for us\u2019, Billy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Polish wasn\u2019t going to be upstaged by the Grateful Dead-weight here, and quickly turned his definition of \u201cconducive\u201d up to eleven for his adoring fans. \u201cActually, everybody, it means making a certain situation likely or possible. As in, these animals weren\u2019t conducive to our way of life when they were living, which led to their extinction. So, we\u2019ve re-made them. Now, they can fit in our pockets. You see, by extracting, or removing, the \u2018big\u2019 gene, African elephants aren\u2019t so intimidating. Also, because they are smaller, their ivory tusks aren\u2019t as valuable as they once were which has helped the species make a come back. We can really embrace elephants like a doggies and kitty kats. Now, isn\u2019t that better?\u201d<\/p>\n

The class resounded in a big African elephant sized, \u201cyes\u201d for Polish like an adoring public singing along.<\/p>\n

\u201cNow then, does anybody want to pet, Elle?\u201d Polish gleefully asked the students, walking up and down the tows of desks.<\/p>\n

\u201cI do! I do! I do\u201d The children frantically raised their hands, standing up in their desks awkwardly.<\/p>\n

Mrs. Thompson, having had no idea that Carol\u2019s dad was going do \u201cshow and tell\u201d, quickly demanded to know if it was safe.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course, we\u2019ve removed anything potentially hazardous from Elle. You\u2019re basically dealing with a toy, or human\u2019s play thing, when it comes to her,\u201d Polish reassured the elderly woman before letting the children run a finger down Elle\u2019s back.<\/p>\n

Her skin felt rough, like touching a concrete rock, most kids thought. She was also heavy like one, too. Elle would squeal a little here and there, and try to wrap her trunk around their pinkies. Most kids retracted their finger though, and wiggled as goosebumps appeared on their skin.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s so weird,\u201d Polish heard the children murmur as he went up and down the rows of desks, crowd surfing.<\/p>\n

\u201cDoes anybody have any questions for Mr. Polish?\u201d Ms. Thompson asked her class. Carol was still beyond words with her father. Most of the class was too excited in anticipation to touch Elle, or giggling with their classmates about the experience, to hear the \u201cold bag\u201d croaking .<\/p>\n

There was a little Indian girl who raised her hand though, and inquired, \u201care there any other ex-stink-ded animals you have rez-a-racked-ded?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnother good question. You guys are all so smart,\u201d Polish boasted, \u201cYes, there are all kinds of species we\u2019ve brought back to life. There\u2019s: the Amur Leopard, Black Rhino, Cross River Gorilla, Hawksbill Turtle, Javan Rhino, Leatherback Turtle, Mountain Gorilla, Saola, South China tiger, Sumatran Elephant, Sumatran Orangutan, Sumatran Rhino, Sumatran Tiger, Vaquita, Western Lowland Gorilla, Yangtze Finless Porpoise, African Wild Dog, Amur Tiger, Asian Elephant, and so much more. I work specifically with the African elephants like Elle, so I wouldn\u2019t be much help with the other species.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou see, there was a lot of extinction in the 21st century as we maintained our ways of living and didn\u2019t consider these animals\u2019 habitats. In the long run, it\u2019s been better for them though. I mean wouldn\u2019t you rather a fun-sized \u2018Elle\u2019 as opposed to a big, scary African Elephant with sharp tusks and no respect for us?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes,\u201d came from not just the students before him, or the other parents and Mrs. Thompson, too, but from Dan Polish, the rockstar of the day.<\/p>\n

He was a man who was now the biggest animal walking the Earth because anything bigger than him was ultimately smaller in his eyes. And, if there was still any animal bigger in size, mass, or population, Dan Polish knew humanity would see its eventual extinction the way most of those other species had in the early 21st century.<\/p>\n<\/article>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dan Polish, 36, watched as the other mommies and daddies eyes pooped bricks. Opening his hairy bear claws for hands, an African elephant charged out across a flat, wooden surfaced Serengetee, running into a pencil holder and apple. Up to this moment, participating in his daughter\u2019s class \u201ccareer day\u201d had been a virtual VIP ticket […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6497,6495,5964,6496],"tags":[6499,6502,3758,6498,689,6501,6500],"class_list":["post-18678","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-ace-myhomework","category-do-my-assignment","category-free-essay","category-in-a-page-paper","tag-assessment-help-australia-writings","tag-best-phd-thesis-writing-with-editing-service-in-australia-new-zealand","tag-help-with-class-coursework","tag-homework-for-you-free-essay","tag-i-need-help-with-my-homework","tag-online-essay-writing-service-no-1-assignment-help-in-australia","tag-online-source-essay-writing-website"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18678","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18678"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18678\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18678"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18678"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.colapapers.com\/us\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18678"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}